humility and faith

Sorry, I accidentally sent that last one before I wrote any more...

I got the amazing privilege to witness another baptism this past Saturday. Cayce was one of my investigators for most of my time in Gaffney. Her husband is not active in church, but the ward informed Sis. Jepsen and I that she had shown some interest in the church. We met her in October of last year and began teaching her. She knew it was all true from the moment she heard the first vision. Her only hold ups were attending church and cigarettes. She struggled to have enough strength to overcome her own fears and weaknesses and take the last steps for baptism. Now, admisdt family troubles, she found the faith to take those last steps, and she entered the waters of baptism! She is such an amazing daughter of God. She refused to do it with out me there. A couple of wonderful members from our ward gave us a ride so we could be there. When Cayce saw me, she called out my name and excitedly hugged me. She was so happy to see me. It was a small and simple service (which is how she wanted it). After she was baptized she told us, " I feel so different."

I didn't realize the affect we can have on people until then. This experience has humbled me. I thought about a story that one of my companions gave me written by a former missionary. It is called "Find Me" and talks about how we had many friends before this life. We each get an assignment for this life. Some of us were blessed to be born into homes where they knew the restored gospel. Others were not. Those who were not assigned to such a family beg of us who are, "Find me. I'll be without those blessings, but I want them. Find me." I have no doubt that Cayce was one of those that I was sent to find. Multiple missionaries have been a part of her life and have helped her along that way, but I was there through most of it, for the longest time. I think it's because for some reason that only He knows, God knew she needed me. That's a very humbling thought. The Lord knows where we are needed, who needs us, who is searching for the gospel, who wants to be found; and we've been given the calling to go where He wants us to go, say what He would like us to say, and do what He needs us to do. We are His tools. There are children waiting for us to open our mouths. We can't afford to not speak up or we might miss a crucial opportunity.

I've been thinking a lot about what humility is this past week. I've been told a couple of times that I'm very humble, but I didn't know exactly what that meant. I can define it in words, but what is it really? I've started creating an answer. Humility is not neccissarily letting everyone else have their way. It's not being quiet and letting others talk. It's a balance. It's a faith in God, an expectation in God. It is literally allowing our will to be swallowed up in the will of the Lord. That doesn't mean being submissive to everyone else, but having such a deep trust in Him and a deep love for Him and for His children on the earth that we are willing to do ANYTHING He asks, even the hard things. For me, that means having the faith to speak up when I am unsure with trust that the Spirit will guide my thoughts. For me it is paying attention to what the person I'm talking to is saying and not on what I should say in reply. For me, it is being willing to do all the hard things, the uncomfortable things, the exhausting things that come with missionary work so that I can be the best servant of the Lord that I can be. It is trying sincerely to discover the Lord's desires for me.

May your week be filled with amazing things! Love you lots!

Love,

Sister Cottam